Stimulating my package (stimulus package) humour

16 04 2010

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence in Yarralumla. One is from Canberra , another from Melbourne , and the third one is from Sydney.  All three go with a government official to examine the fence.

 The Canberra contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works out some figures with a pencil. “Well”, he says, “I figure the job will run to about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me”.

The Melbourne contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says “I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me” 

The Sydney contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the government official and whispers “$2,700”.

The government official, incredulous, says “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?’

The Sydney contractor whispers back “$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you, and we hire the bloke from Melbourne to fix the fence”. “Done!” replies the government official.

And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.

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